Cope ahead

Plan and rehearse how you’ll handle a hard situation before you’re in it.

When to use it

Before a situation likely to set off strong emotions or problem behavior.

Step by step

Describe the situation. Check the facts; be specific. Name the emotions and urges likely to get in the way.
Decide which skills you’ll use. Write it out in detail.
Imagine the situation as vividly as you can — you in it, now, not watching.
Rehearse coping well: what you’ll do, think, and say, and how. Include new problems and your worst-case.
Practice relaxation afterward.