Pocket guide
Every skill from the program, in plain language.
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How to pick the right skill for the moment.
Red zone, blue zone
Rate your distress first. It tells you which kind of skill to reach for.Practice before you need it
Skills feel awkward at first. Practice them when you’re calm so they’re automatic in a crisis.Distress Tolerance
Red zone · acceptanceGet through a crisis without making it worse.
TIPPguided
Change your body chemistry fast when emotions are too high to think.Paced breathing (box)guided
In, hold, out, hold — four even counts. The last P in TIPP.4-7-8 breathingguided
In for 4, hold for 7, out for 8. A long exhale to slow everything down.Double-inhale sighguided
Two sips in through the nose, one long sigh out. About a minute.Deep belly breathingguided
Ten slow breaths that start in the belly. Exhale longer than you inhale.STOPguided
Don’t just react. Freeze, step back, look, then act on purpose.Safe-place visualizationguided
The Imagery skill from IMPROVE: a calm room inside you that nothing can enter.Progressive muscle relaxationguided
Tense and release each muscle group, toes to face.Self-soothe with the five sensesguided
Be kind to yourself through sight, sound, smell, taste, and touch.Wise Mind ACCEPTS
Distract yourself from painful thoughts until the wave passes.IMPROVE the moment
Replace the bad moment with a better one.Pros and cons
Weigh acting on a crisis urge against riding it out — before the urge hits.Radical acceptance
Stop fighting reality. Pain is unavoidable; suffering is what fighting it adds.Turning the mind
Acceptance is a choice you make at a fork in the road — again and again.Willingness over willfulness
Do just what’s needed, from Wise Mind — instead of refusing, forcing, or giving up.Half-smile and willing handsguided
Accept reality with your body. Your face and hands talk to your brain.Mindfulness of current thoughts
Thoughts are events in the brain, not facts. Watch them come and go.Awareness of connectionguided
Notice what’s holding you up — the floor, the chair, your sheets.SACRED SELF
Five self-compassion skills for how you treat yourself.Loving kindnessguided
Send warm wishes to yourself, then outward to others.Mindfulness
Red zone · acceptanceNotice the present moment, without judging it.
Counting your breathguided
Count each breath from 1 to 10. Lose count? Start again at 1.Describe to ground yourselfguided
Say what you see and hear, out loud or silently, to come back to the present.Wise Mindguided
The balance of Emotion Mind and Reasonable Mind. Make decisions from here.“What” skills
Observe, Describe, Participate — what you do when you practice mindfulness.“How” skills
Nonjudgmentally, One-mindfully, Effectively — how you practice.Urge surfingguided
Ride an urge like a wave. Don’t feed it, don’t fight it — it crests and passes.Alternate rebellion
Rebel in ways that don’t hurt you or derail your goals.Emotion Regulation
Blue zone · changeUnderstand emotions, lower your vulnerability, change the ones that don’t fit.
What emotions do
Emotions communicate, motivate, and signal. They aren’t facts.Describing an emotion
Every emotion has a trigger, an interpretation, body changes, urges, and after-effects.Myths about emotions
Common beliefs that get in the way — and challenges to them.ABC PLEASE
Lower your vulnerability to Emotion Mind and build a life worth living.Cope ahead
Plan and rehearse how you’ll handle a hard situation before you’re in it.When you can’t sleepguided
Sleep hygiene, and what to do instead of ruminating.Mindfulness of current emotionguided
Let an emotion be a wave — don’t block it, don’t hold on to it.Check the facts
Our interpretations often drive emotions more than events do. Check them.Opposite action
Every emotion has an urge. Act opposite to it — all the way — to change the emotion.Problem solving
When the emotion fits the facts, change the situation.When skills aren’t working
A checklist for when you’re trying and nothing is helping.Interpersonal Effectiveness
Blue zone · changeAsk for what you need, say no, and keep relationships and self-respect.
Three kinds of effectiveness
Before a hard conversation, decide what matters most: the outcome, the relationship, or your self-respect.DEAR MAN
Ask for what you want, or say no, clearly and effectively.GIVE
Keep the relationship while you ask or say no.FAST
Keep your self-respect.How strongly to ask or say no
A 1–10 scale from hinting to insisting, and the factors that decide where to land.Cheerleading statements
Answers to the myths that stop you from asking or saying no.Building and ending relationships
Finding people, staying mindful of them, and leaving destructive relationships safely.Walking the Middle Path
Both-and thinking, validation, and changing patterns.
Dialectics
Two things that seem opposite can both be true. Acceptance AND change.Thinking traps
Ten common cognitive errors to catch.Validation
Find the kernel of truth in someone’s experience — including your own.Changing behavior
Reinforce what you want more of; don’t feed what you want less of.An educational companion to skills training — not therapy or medical advice.