← Walking the Middle Path
Validation
Find the kernel of truth in someone’s experience — including your own.
What it is
Recognizing that feelings, thoughts, and actions have causes and make sense. It doesn’t mean agreeing or liking it. Only validate the valid.
How
- Pay attention — eye contact, no multitasking.
- Reflect back what you heard, open to correction.
- Notice what isn’t being said.
- Understand: “It makes sense that you… because…”
- Acknowledge the valid — act on it.
- Treat them as an equal, not as fragile.
Recovering from invalidation
- Check the facts with someone you trust.
- Acknowledge what wasn’t valid, and what was.
- Drop judgmental self-statements; remember you’re doing your best.
- Be compassionate with yourself — it hurts to be invalidated.
- Grieve harm from invalidation that was deeply hurtful.
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